Selena Gomez Admits She Was ‘Very Reactive’ in Past Relationships: ‘I’ve Made Mistakes’

Selena Gomez is reflecting on growing from former loves.

In a combined interview released on March 24 with her fiancé Benny Blanco for the On Purpose with Jay Shetty podcast, the Only Murders in the Building star looked back on past relationships. The couple released their joint album I Said I Love You First days prior, which gives fans an inside look into their bond.

Gomez, 32, and Blanco, 37, spoke about conflict resolution, arguing with your romantic partner and how sometimes it can be emotional and overblown.

“I’ve been guilty though to start. I think for me, I necessarily felt like in other situations of mine I was very reactive. I think that’s why I was alone for five years because I really needed to collect myself,” Gomez said in the podcast episode.

The “Lose You to Love Me” singer also noted that it’s taken time for her to mature and she isn’t sure she would have been emotionally ready to be with Blanco.

“I think in the past, that’s why I said to him all the time 10 years ago it’s not that I wouldn’t have wanted to be with you, I just wouldn’t have been in the right headspace, and I don’t think you deserved what I had gone through before,” said Gomez.

She continued: “I’ve learned a lot of lessons and I’ve made mistakes and I just want this to be right. So for me, that was a lesson that I had to learn.”

“I think girls can equally want to be right. For me, it was really difficult in the past and he’s made it unbelievably easy so that if I even get to the point where I’m so frustrated, he’s like very quick to understand,” said Gomez.

She concluded by saying that Blanco’s patience helped her change her headspace and shift her frame of mind from reacting too quickly.

The couple began dating in 2023, going public with their relationship in December 2023. They got engaged the following December when Blanco surprised an apparently “grumpy” Gomez with a stunning marquise diamond.

“This album came together organically as a direct result of the comfort that they both felt when working together creatively, allowing them to produce art that authentically reflects their experiences,” a press release announcing the album read.

It continued: “It chronicles their entire story—before they met, falling in love and looking to what the future holds.”